“It’s easier to act your way into a new way of feeling, than it is to feel your way into a new way of acting.” I don’t know if you’ve come across this quote but if you haven’t. You can very well make it some sort of daily mantra. Because it’s TRUE. These activities to build self-esteem will prove it.
- Listening to Inspirational music
Ask any neuroscientist about music and he will tell you it’s one of those things that stimulate the brain like nothing else. Scientists don’t know why but the human brain responds to music in magical ways. Music can be soothing. It makes some people cry while making others become supermen – at least for a few moments.
So, anytime you feel down. Whenever you feel like your esteem is taking a beating, music is your best friend. You will go from “Shit, am about to die” to “Fuck, I can take on the world.” And if this music is inspirational – depending on your circumstances, the better.
Here’s what you should do from here, every time you listen to a song that has an effect on you, write it down or better yet add it to a playlist on your favorite music gadget. And when a situation arises when you need its magic (it usually does), go ahead and listen to this particular song.
- Sweat-breaking exercises
Blood is supposed to flow hustle-free inside the body. And when it does, you’ll feel energetic in everything you do. And guess which activities get it going? Anything that makes you sweat.
Running. High jumping. Sex – yeah sex too. Name it.
As long as you break some sweat, you’re going to feel good about yourself after that. And if you do it over and over – 4 or more days a week, your self-esteem will thank you for it.
- Hanging out with friends who appreciate who you’re.
This is so important. A friend who doesn’t judge you can make you feel like you’re on top of the world. And one who’s always trying to change you can make you feel like a fraud. It’s no secret that the people we surround ourselves with have an immense effect on us.
The moment you feel like your esteem is down, always track down friends who appreciate who you’re. They’ll make you feel invisible again.
- Watching an awesome serial movie
Like a fitting song, an incredible movie can easily make your day. And because we bond and understand things better with repetition, you should opt for serial movies. In a serial movie, events last for a considerable time. This makes it easy for you to follow-up on events and solutions to problems are more detailed. You build a connection to the actors. Hence things stick to the mind.
And depending on your situation, choose a movie that kind of addresses your condition to the fullest. But if you’re not sure, a movie where actors are overcoming a lot of adversity will always do great.
- Becoming competent at something.
Competence breeds confidence. And confidence breeds self-esteem.
Pick an activity that sets you on fire. Then for the next days, months and years – become as good as you can at this particular thing. Before you know it, your self-esteem will be enviable. And if this something is considered hard by most people, the better.
See, self-esteem is not brought about by plain thinking. It’s created by what you do. This in turn influences your state of mind. And finally boom – your self-esteem shoots up in the roof.
Let me assume you’re passionate about art and design. Take all the time in the world to harness and streamline this passion of yours. Dedicate a good chunk of hours in the day just so you become unbeatable at this. Then with time, you’ll begin feeling better than you have ever before. And then this feeling gets transferred to other parts of your life.
Like dating incredible women. If it wasn’t obvious.
- Consistent contact with the people you care about.
This one is huge. You and me. We’re social animals. Whether we like it or not, we NEED contact with other people. People who care about you.
I don’t know if it’s your girlfriend, wife, siblings, parents or friends. It’s always the same. It feels nice hanging around people who care about you. These people will always have your interests at heart. With such people, you will feel needed and cherished. Your self-esteem will shoot up the roof.
- Living in sync with your own nature.
The reason most people suffer endlessly; is living out of sync with their own nature. You find a very healthy and hyper-sexual man dying of loneliness in the name of keeping up with society expectations of sexual fidelity. You should be wary of anything “conventional wisdom”
Most of the behaviors, attitudes and habits entertained by the society at large rarely help you as an individual. They are mostly geared towards maintaining stable communities.
You should be aware of these pitfalls. The only time you should be in sync with them is when they’re in sync with your own nature. As long as you’re not hurting anybody, you’re good to go.
So, if you’ve been attending endless parties and ceremonies against your own will. Just because every normal human being does it. Stop it today. Do things because they make sense to you. Because you enjoy doing them. But not because it’s the routine for everyone. Routines will kill you.
It will only be a matter of time before your self-esteem is back on track. It will feel like you’ve just sucked all toxics out of your system. It feels refreshing.
- Avoid people who put you down
To stay in constant contact with people you care about and care about you. Means staying completely out of reach from people who put you down.
Some people will tell you to just “ignore them”. But the human mind rarely ignores anything. Especially when that anything is negative. To the mind, negativity is a source of information. And this information – when used right – might help survival in future.
Which is okay.
But the problem is; there’s a limit to the negativity you can take in – to stay healthy. That’s why watching News on TV is never advised. It’s the same reason you should stay away from friends and acquaintances who overwhelm you with too much negativity. Too much low energy.
Seriously, it’s hard enough failing at your business venture. Or a relationship. Or at some goal of yours. Add in someone reminding you how much you’re misguided and unable to do anything worthwhile. And you’re fucked.
Reading is so freaking underrated. In fact, I should have put it as the very first activity.
Seriously it’s the only way I know of where you can learn so much about many people’s experiences. And the more you peer through other people’s lives, the more you come to this realization; everyone is a fool. Everyone is stupid. And everyone is struggling with life in one way or another. Irrespective of the masks of coolness and bravery everyone puts on.
This insight relieves you from a lot of pressure and the desire to always match the outstanding. Most of what we portray to the world is false. It’s the same case for every human being. At the core, most of us feel like a fraud. It’s just that we go ahead and think other people are genuine. But they’re not.
But all that stops when you fall in love with reading.
You get to know other people’s stories. You get to see how much similar we’re as human beings no matter how much we like focusing on our differences. No matter our skin color differences. No matter where we live. And in moments like these, you feel at peace – satisfied, with who you’re. In moments like these, your self-esteem shoots up a million fold.